Emily’s church experience has been different from the rest of our guests. Being involved in church, gave exposure to some of the hypocrisy that she witness in church leadership, as well as questioning the strong emotional output and if that is the Spirit, or just our neuropathways firing off.
Join us as we hear Emily’s story of her church experiences and why she thinks sometimes the church can act more like a cult, than a biblical church. If you have any questions or comments on this episode, please send us a message over at thescottstedman.com
Britta had been a part of the Christian church culture from the time of birth. However, a question asked in a class at a Christian college began to question the church culture she was brought up in and was able to see some of the fallacies in the mega-church culture where she worked at.
Join us as we hear Britta’s story of her faith deconstruction. If you have any questions or comments on this episode, please send us a message over at thescottstedman.com
Ryan Garnes has a passion for ministry and has been involved in church from worship ministry to youth ministry. However, specific events in the leadership of the church had led to his departure from the church and pursue other avenues of ministry outside the church.
Join us as we hear Ryan’s story and his views on ministry in a post-modern world. If you have any questions or comments on this episode, please send us a message over at thescottstedman.com
Veronica grew us having a diverse upbringing within her family and church life. When her family moved to Indiana from Texas, she begin to find a sense of home within the church and at college. However, during her time at a private Christian university, she began to deconstruct her faith as she moved out west to pursue an acting career.
Join us as we hear Veronica’s story of her faith deconstruction and if she will ever decide to be part of a local church after he wild experience at a church in West Hollywood. If you have any questions or comments on this episode, please send us a message over at thescottstedman.com
Phil Van Dyke grew up in a standard protestant Christian home, and the church was a huge part of his faith development and life. When Phil went to a private Christian University, that was when he began to question his faith and the world around him.
Join us as we hear Phil’s story of his faith development and why he has converted to the Catholic Church. If you have any questions or comments on this episode, please send us a message over at thescottstedman.com
Mandi is a Pastor’s Daughter, who practically grew up in the church. After graduating college and going to work at a megachurch, she began to experience some of the anxiety and fallacies of church life and began to reevaluate what the church is supposed to be.
Join us as we hear Mandi’s story of her faith development and where she is now. If you have any questions or comments on this episode, please send us a message over at thescottstedman.com
Lindsey had a strong foundation in her family as they would attend church and have get-togethers at her grandparent’s house. This community of family and love, let to a shape in her theology as she would love others, especially those who were less fortunate. As she got older, she begin to see how judgemental the church can be, especially when it came to caring for the poor.
Join us as we hear Lindsey’s story of her faith development and where she is now. If you have any questions or comments on this episode, please send us a message over at thescottstedman.com
Josh participated in a new church plant in his area and was blown away by the simplicity of the church model from its infrastructure to its mission. This leads to him, pursuing his ordination and taking an associate pastor position away from home. Three years later, he resigned from the church and is in a season of waiting.
Join us as Josh shares his thoughts on church ministry and his reasons why he left the church. If you have any feedback, feel free to send us an email at our website thescottstedman.com
In the last 20 months, we have seen a surge of individuals sharing their deconstruction stories throughout social media. In the wake of this mass departure from church life, leaders have been conflicted on what deconstruction is. Some say it’s bad, others good, but wherever you fall on the spectrum, the fact is there are people who are dissatisfied with church life. This episode will focus on what deconstruction is, what it is not, and how we can renew our faith development through the process.
February 2015, I was packing up my family’s stuff from the house we were living in as we were moving out of state. when the moving truck door closed down and everyone was in their cars to make the six-hour trek down south, I took off the keys that I had been carrying for three years as minister to a church in Cortland, Ohio. My wife looked at me and asked if my key chain felt lighter as I had removed the keys to the church and the house. I laughed and said it is a bit lighter as I walked into the church for the final time. A few of my elders were standing around talking with me and saying our goodbyes and thanking me for the great work I had done for the church. I asked where I should put the keys and one of the elders held out their hands as I gently placed them and grasped their hands with kindness and generosity.
It would be around 24 hours where I would be handed new keys, new weight for the opportunity for the Lord to use me and my family to bless this new ministry I have been called to. I never would have thought that six years later, I would be in the same place of dropping off keys, dropping off weight, to go into this next adventure in life to see where the Lord will use me to bless others. Except for this time, it felt different.
At the beginning of the year, I see more conversations about people dropping the extra weight they are carrying. Most of it is physical weight as they diet, get a gym membership, and persevere to hit weight-loss goals they have set before them. Others are purging material weight to free up space in their homes. I think that we tend to remove weight in our lives that tend to burden us. Whether that is the removal of fat cells, giving away old clothes, or the painful removal of individuals from your life who cause unnecessary drama. Like a snake that sheds its skin, people go through a process of dropping weight from their lives. However, there is some weight that we want to keep in our lives. This is the type of weight that if removed would be painful. We can work out our bodies to lose fat, and feel the pain of sore muscles that will eventually grow to be bigger to help burn more fat. It’s the pain of letting go of one’s addictive substance because they want to have a healthier lifestyle and repair fractured relationships due to addiction. Most of the time the good weight we want to keep, is intermingled with the weight we want to drop or have to drop.
I reflect on my years in Cortland and dropping those keys in one of my elder’s hands. With that drop came memories of doing new fruitful ministries, such as having a clothing shed that helped us give free clothing to our community. Memories of carrying a heavy bag of peanuts to make peanut brittle with the Christian Women Connection, memories of frustration with no one coming to an event, and memories of great love and losses that come with being a pastor. In hindsight, I look back at those years and think of how blessed I was to be the pastor of those individuals and how even today, some of them still reach out to me for prayer, wisdom, or simply to tell me how much they appreciated all the work I put into the church and that there is fruit from my leadership that continues to grow.
When I dropped my keys off a few weeks ago at the church I pastored at, it felt a lot different from when I was in Cortland. In some ways, there was some weight I was glad to drop;
The disrespect
The hurtful words
The tearing down of my character and my family
The backstage politics
The broken promises
The broken dreams
Some of the weight that I will miss is
Visiting the shut-ins
Driving to the hospital and praying for people
Baptizing people (even if it’s in the bathtub
Praying for people in the church and the community
Bible study
preparing messages and getting text messages on how important the message had impacted them
being in a community with people I love
Today, I got a call that a woman from church was at the hospital with her husband who was feeling ill. I called her to get an update on her husband and to offer up a prayer for them. During that conversation, the woman asked me how I was doing. That was the paradox where joy and pain collided. On one hand, I was fine. I was enjoying time with my family and friends I haven’t seen in years. On the other hand, was the searing pain of not being able to see this individual every week, getting those strong side hugs, holding her hands as I pray with her, and encourage her in her walk with the Lord. Because going back into that environment will bring up a lot of sorrow of loss, and pain being around those who love me and those who threw stones at me behind the curtain.
When I dropped the weight of the keys in the elder’s hand in Cortland, there was warmth, respect, and gratitude as I got in the truck and drove down south. When I dropped the keys off at my last church, it was on a desk, in an empty building, alone.
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